Dark descisions

I had made up my mind to break things off with him. But when I think about it maybe it's not so great an idea. I don't love him the way I used to, I know that, but I still do love him. I don't want to cause him pain, but I think maybe that I am not going to be properly happy until I am not his girlfriend. It's hard, but I find myself fancying other people, wondering what it would be like to see someone else, to sleep with someone else, to be on my own for a while. Truth is I think I am bored of being with him. We seem to spend more time having niggly bickery fights than ever, I don't know if that's just a phase we're going through or if it's because we're drifting apart. Well I'm drifting away from him, he seems to love me even more than he did, which is why it's going to hurt him so much if I break it off. I'm not really miserable with him, but then I'm not really happy either. I'm supposed to be going for a weekend away with a few friends soon, and I don't want him to come. That says something to me.